Battle of the Bands: Australia vs. Canada

(Tourists pose in front of an Olympic countdown sign in Vancouver. Photo copyright Christy Karras)

According to 2010 rankings by the Economist Intelligence Unit, Vancouver, BC is the most liveable city in the world. So geographically close to where I sit now, yet so far away in rank from any American city, none of which even made it close to the top of the list. Why? It all comes down to criteria. Americans may be shocked to learn that the UK-based publication doesn’t look highly on America’s lack of universal health care. And American tourists who tightly clutch their purses when they travel abroad might be surprised to learn about America’s higher rates of violent crime than in many other parts of the world.

Canada and Australia have the most cities on the top 10 list. I’ve traveled in both countries and have to say that life there, at least by objective standards, is good. Their citizens are well educated, healthy, and well paid. Much higher minimum wages mean few are poor or hungry. And nobody goes bankrupt because of hospital bills. Imagine that.

America does has some things going for it. After all, crime and uncertainty make life exciting. And I was appalled by the small number of Mac users in Australia. It’s a Microsoft monopoly over there.

The praises heaped on Canada and Australia today remind me of the “Australia vs. Canada” game we used to play in college. It boils down to this question: In a contest between Australia and Canada, which country has exported the most good music per capita? The catch is, you have to subtract points for the crappy acts. So, sadly, Celine Dion’s negatives outweigh the goodness of Diana Krall.

Who wins? It partly depends on how you feel about country music (there’s the Shania Twain juggernaut, though she goes up against the not-insignificant Keith Urban). But ultimately, there’s no question in my mind that Australia comes out way ahead, mostly because Australia has given us fewer big-name acts, and certainly nothing terrible enough to overcome the likes of of AC/DC and INXS (I’m sure those awful bands exist, but they – mercifully – haven’t made it to the States).

Yeah, Canada’s got Neil Young. But it’s hard to forgive Bryan Adams. And sure, everyone loves the Barenaked Ladies, but I just can’t bring myself to vote for a country that inflicted Nickelback on me.

Next time, maybe I’ll add the U.S. into the mix. Lord knows we’ve got some bad music right here.

But I bet we’d beat Canada.